Ahhhhhhhh yes, it is Friday night in America. And I am stuck in my tiny corner at my tiny desk lamenting the fact that it is THIS close to Christmas, and I will have a grand total of half my family present for the holiday.
My husband's mother was admitted to the hospital 2 days ago, after presenting (what was thought at the time to be) the symptoms of a stroke.
-- I refer to her as my husband's mother because there is literally no love lost between this woman and I. I would NEVER wish any ill will upon her, and really feel horribly that this is occuring (especially at this time.) But I really think that if she weren't such a manipulative beeeeyaaatch all the time, we might have a better relationship. --
NEWay -- her CAT Scan/MRI/Whatever-test-they-ran have come back clear - so no major stroke as of yet. But the dr does feel that she is having mini-strokes, and that these will lead to a large one eventually. (Mind you, eventually could mean 10 yrs from now.) It is most certainly either that, or her blood sugar (she is diabetic), or her heart (at this point I would have been questioning exactly what it was that the doctor DID, in fact, know.)
So The Man is currently perched at her side, patting her hand, and consoling her. While we sit here about 1000 mi away.
As a general rule, I am not a bitter/hateful/generally rotten person, but they have the mother/son relationship of many varieties of animals that eat their young (not that she would actively eat her young, but that she has the same cunning, manipulative nature that animals that do predatorily consume their own species exhibit.) And, one would figure that he would rather be here (with the family that hasn't enabled his "neediness" and fed into his co-dependency and essentially held him down his whole life) for the holiday, than listening to her drone on and on with the "oh, please don't feel sorry for me. I will be just fine. Could you be troubled to hand me that paper over there though, as I feel the necessity to scrawl down my last will and testiment while I still have the strength to hold the pen in my hand" speech.
I understand that she is his mother, but (I feel) that there comes a point in everyone's life where the toxicity of a relationship outweighs the blood that flows between 2 people.
Then again, maybe I am just a great big BEEEEEYYYYAAAATCH!!!
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3 comments:
Nah - you're cool. My mother-in-law sends these heartfelt letters at Christmas about how much she loves Mr. Hot. Unfortunately, the rest of the year she forgets he exists.
And of course, I may (MAY) be holding a grudge since she never acknowledged our son's birth. (He's 16 now)
Thanks.
My husband called me today to inform me that the DR couldn't find anything wrong with her (I said they should give her a Psyche eval - then they would def. find something wrong)
He then informed me that his mother was introducing his brother's girlfriend as her daughter to the people at the hospital. No mention of a daughter in law though. How sad. (Not really.)
I told him "I could care less." LOL
And they wonder why we live half a continent away from them?
Wow, am I ever glad I had the mil I did. I miss her so much. She never meddled or played the 'poor me' crap some people do. I'm sorry your family has to go through that. I hope that your husband soon finds the strength to say 'no' to her games and to tell her he wants to be where he is truly loved and appreciated.
You don't sound bitter or rotten to me at all. You sound like someone who's probably tried her best!
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